Crooked wheels keep turning
Children, are you learning
Acclimatize but don't you lose the plot
A history of blisters
Your brothers and your sisters
Somewhere in the pages we forgot
Take a number Jackie
Where the blood just barely dried
You know I'm on your side
Wait for something better
No one behind you
Watching your shadows
You gotta be stronger than the story
Don't let it blind you
Rivers of shadow
This feeling wont go
And the sky is full of dreams
But you don't know how to fly
I don't have a simple answer
But I know that I could answer
This feeling won't go
~ Lifted from The Killers' 'This is your life'
So here I am once again, being my usual impulsive self, writing a note of good bye. Hopes and aspirations were, let's put it as a lil bit assuming, used in an advantageous way.
So apparently, that's how life teaches you to just let go and reroute. You can fool everyone in the world but yourself. I lay all my cards, bits and pieces are too frustrating.
I thought I wanted it, I really, really thought so. But maybe, it ain't the right one for me. Passion's still aflame, but the means probably were miscalculated.
I suppose it's my personality which doesn't fit. Inasmuch as I teach myself to like the four corners, I just can't. Have me a corner, but let the other sides out in the open. Hands on, let my hands dirty, I like that more.
Another thing, I want things to be on the low. I want to experience starting from scratch, learning the ropes, sweating like hell, but I don't care, really. Passion's a burning, kindle it.
The past few, it dragged me. My words would def downplay my admiration for them, for being the passionate beings to the less fortunate ones. And with that, my deepest respect. It was a drag for me, unfortunately, because my passion can't level with them.
I abhor that feeling because I've always believed in the cause. But no, I failed some people. I failed aspirations. And I failed this little beating heart.
I'm still up for it; raring for it. It might take a little while to know what is it I really want, but I'm patient. Yes, I am. I know it will take me more of reroutes and trials, but lemme leave it at this: I'm ready.
Sweet night to you reading this post.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
I so hate failing people and expectations, but I just can't help it. The means is just there--that wanting, burning. But the drive's nowhere to be found in the midst of an ocean of passionate and good souls who continually amaze me in all aspects. It is frustratingly depressing that, for the oddest reason, I can't level with. Well, I guess we gotta reroute. Monday it is.
Posted by Upper Viceo at 8:23 AM
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
I realized something the past few days. No matter how I, eventually, hated the previous grind, it's still where I sorta belong. I mean, just the thought of it meeting fellow wanderlusts to brainstorming everything that has to do with the world of paper and travel, everything comes out naturally. For the oddest reason, no matter how traumatic the past was, it's still there where I'm the happiest. A certain kind of stoke which I can probably do until I grow old.
Posted by Upper Viceo at 10:18 AM
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Vented out some hollashit yesterday. Is it working out? I really don't know. Some pieces don't meet, needles don't fit. Frustrating bit. Even thought of losing the rope, but no. It's too soon to let go, so one more chance, and probably another. Trying to get the hang of it, one step at a time, til we get it right. Patience.
Posted by Upper Viceo at 6:37 AM